how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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10inch nice

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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yes i can connor, this is brett.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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At 1:00AM, an old man is woken up by a knocking on the door. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'An orange' The man opens the door to find a talking orange on his doorstep. The man remembers he has Schizophrenia and goes back to sleep.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

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In the movie, Full Metal Jacket, my favorite part was when the entire platoon beat PVT. Pyle with hard soap while he was tied down. Actually I am lying. That part was extremely cruel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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