Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

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Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

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what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

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why are you reading this? You are bored out of your mind and don't want to do you're homework. and now that you read this, you will realize what you're doing and will now get back to work.

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How do you approach a hot guy in the library? Very quietly.

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If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

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What's brown, smells like shit, and are annoying as hell? Taking shits

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What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

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John Cena for president

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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hickory dickory dock no one cares

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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