What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

A guy was beet by his wife.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

Why did the girl have twins she was raped

FUS RO DAH!!!

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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