A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

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A man wins 1 million dollars on the pokies. He goes home and tells his wife and kids about the big win. The next day the man goes go the casino and and loses the 1 million as he is addicted to gambling

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what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well, one must question: 1. How much the electrician knows when it comes to screwing in lightbulbs. 2. The amount of electricians present at the scene. 3. The type of equipment being used in the process. 4. The physical and mental stability of the electrician. The situation is solely dependent on the above factors.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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I love you

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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what do you call a black man in a car? -a person who passed his drivers test

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What do we want? Equal rights for people with Tourette's Syndrome. When do we want them? Fuck!

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

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Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

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Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

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Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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