Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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What do you get when you cross a man with a horse? The Nobel Prize for your advancement of genetic sciences; centaurs aren’t real.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? the NBA

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Once upon a time, The end.

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Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

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Jim: You know whats funny? Bob: What? Jim: The 28th Amendment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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