"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

What do you call a man that's not funny? An un - funny man!

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

911 jokes are just plane wrong

Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

The Charlotte Bobcats

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

Refridgerator.

What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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