Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

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Replacement Referees

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If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

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Why was the black guy so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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*Knock knock! "Who's there?" "Jehovah's witness" .....

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What hapenz when u drnk very hot cup of tea after lunch ............:-> nothing ... Cup becomes empty

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

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I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

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what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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