The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

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"...."-Hellen Keller

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If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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Where did the did the Islamic person fly the jet to? Ben Gurion International Airport located in Israel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops