Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

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What is black and white and red all over? Micheal Jackson being torchured

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It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

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What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

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Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

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What's the last thing to go through a flys head when it hits your windshield? Its ass.

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Q: What did the magician do to cure his cold?? A: Took medicine!

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What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? A gorilla with with a banana in each ear? Unless it has a name, then refer to it by it's name. be polite.

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I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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what do you call justin bieber having sex baby baby baby oh

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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"My, what big teeth you have!" exclaimed Little Red Riding Hood. "Because I'm a wolf," explained the wolf. "And I dress in women's clothing because it makes me happier."

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Three penguins are at the top of snowy hill. The first penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" The second penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" Finally, the third penguin slides down and hill and yells "RADIO!"

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What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

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Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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