What is red and green and goes round and round? A frog in a blender!

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved

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Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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Want to here a joke? Me to...

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

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What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead

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What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

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What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

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Whats worse than bieber fever? A yeast infection.

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How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

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What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

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Did you hear about the sale on the toyota cars from japan? if you can get it out of the water its free!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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