Why did the Chicken Cross the road? Because it did...

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A: Knock Knock B: Whos there A: Orange B: Orange who A: Arent you glad i didnt say chair

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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Feminism.

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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What does a black guy and an apple have in common? They're both apples except for the black guy

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A man walks into a bar He is now in the emergency room suffering from deep lacerations to the forehead as well as a bloody nose.

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How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

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Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

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ring ring,Who is? you'r face.you'r face how?you'r but hole face.

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What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops