Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? Because her asshole brother pushed her :)

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

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Bad grammers.

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Did you here about the man who dropped a glass? It broke.

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A giant storm loomed over a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who has been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

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What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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knowck knowck whos there? shea shea who? shea...duh!

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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