"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

Your mom is so stupoid she put a piece of paper on the TV and called it paper view!

whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

Obama

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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