why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

thumb_up thumb_down -3

This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a woman votes!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is red and has no legs? Half a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Loperson

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -3

caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I didn't know that guy did crossfit

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

thumb_up thumb_down -3

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Phew... it's gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops