A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Sticks and stones may break my bones.

A: Knock Knock B: ...

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

It said i can write my own joke so i did.

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

your skull would make a nice pen holder

What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

A blackman and an asian are walking down the street they pass eachother exchange looks and continue on with their day

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

roses are red violets are blue some poems make sense banana monkey glue

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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