Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

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Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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Which is the rarest animal in the North pole? The Polaroid.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Your momma's so fat that she can't pass through some turnstiles and needs go through some other way with people staring and feel sad about it.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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A bus with 11 passengers is making its final stops for the night. At main street it drops of 6 people and picks up 2, at broad it drops of 3 and picks up 4, at 3rd street it drops of 5 and picks up 1, and finally at 6th street it drops off 4 and picks up 0. How many people are still on the bus? 13 if you include the dead bodies in the back

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What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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