What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

womens rights.

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

Q: Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? A: Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, I’ll replace this with a fresh bowl of soup and I’ll have a word with the manager to see if we can deduct a sum from your bill for the inconvenience we have caused you

What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

The morning of her 16th birthday, April's parents presented her with a young racehorse named Bolt. Bolt was energetic and strong the first two days, easily trotting around their 4 acre estate, but the following morning, when April went out to bring Bolt his breakfast, she found him leaning on his stable, head down, slowly rolling side to side. Upon seeing her newfound friend in distress, she promptly asked, "Are you okay Bolt? Why the long face?" Soon after, April realized that she had made a clever pun and grinned childishly. April's glory was short lived however, when Bolt suddenly collapsed due to an aortic aneurysm. Having spent most of their retirement on this racehorse, April's parents sold the ranch and moved into a retirement home, disgracing their daughter for not taking care of their steed. April, believing herself to be the culprit for Bolt's death, later committed suicide.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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