Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Velcro. What a rip off.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Michael Jackson is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black guy in a prison? A warden. You racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's 50 feet tall, wears glasses and plays dungeons and dragons. A nerd, I lied about the 50 feet part.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the best type of silence in a family? None, all families should be open in communication.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man have drugs? He had a very serious medical condition that involved putting himself at a high risk at any time without proper medications, therefore he requires drugs to sustain him and hopefully prevent him from dying. To immediately believe that he was in possession of illegal drugs is a very racist assumption that is representative of one of the numerous racial problems that faces our society today.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you hear about the giant termite who walks into a beer joint and asks, "Is the bartender here?" Did you...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One baby is alive in the middle. What's worse than that? He is eating his way out...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops