Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

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whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

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A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. It was the chickens decision thus, not affecting your life greatly. You should therefore mind your own business and let the chicken live his life with capability of using it's rights.

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

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Face...the other white meat!

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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Hey guess what? What? I have good news and bad news. The bad news is you're mom died. I lied about the good news.

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops