Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

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What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Why did Gary's cat fall from the tree? He didn't use enough gaffa tape.

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Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

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What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

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I told a joke to my friends. They laughed.

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

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(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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What did the hispanic guy say after he took a bite out of a McDonald's hot n' spicy chicken sandwhich. I'm lovin' it.

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What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

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roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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