What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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yo' Mamma's so fat when she stepped on the scale, she said "hey, that's my phone number"!

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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Poop

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Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

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Janey Had her first kiss with Jonny. Jonny choked on her ridiculously large was of gum and died.

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On the next line im going to write a joke: George W. Bush

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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what do you call a guy called Bill? Bill

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Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

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Where's my tractor?

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If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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