Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

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Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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meh

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Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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This is not a joke or is it

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Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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GONNA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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