This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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Darude- Sandstorm

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

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Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

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A man walks into a bar. The man says,"ouch, how could I have not seen the bar."

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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The Christian Bible.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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i am and me is i

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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