What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the Chinese man have a cat in his oven? Because his wife had decided to divorce him that day so he threw he in the oven, and the cat happened to be in her arms at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Did you know Hellen Keller had a dog? Niether did she

thumb_up thumb_down +30

It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A black man walks into an abbatoir.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops