What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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What do you call a guy who can't get a girlfriend? Me.

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I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

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Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

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Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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I share two rooms with my mother.

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A midget walks under a bar

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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What worse than rain Osama Bin Laden

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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