If the opposite of Pro is Con, whats the opposite of progress?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There Are 2 People A lack Person And A White Person, The Black Person Looks Over At The White Person And Said, "Hi Tyrone!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does a snowplow clearing an empty parking lot look like? A horse running freely in a pasture

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"Free to play" Play free "right now"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops