Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

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What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion.

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

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What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

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An asian is driving a car. He observes the speed limit and uses his turning signals while switching lanes.

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

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What's the difference between? Your mom.

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What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

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A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

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Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

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What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

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Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops