Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Thanks

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your on a bus and you ask your math teacher if you got the answers on the homework right and the bus crashes in the middle of an intersection.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

minecraft

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

sarah taylor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops