What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -19

roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -21

like this or you will die at some point in your life

thumb_up thumb_down -21

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops