Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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