Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Phew... it's gone.

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

Yesterday, I was assasinated.

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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