Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

american idol

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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