What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

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What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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sky's sty

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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