Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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