Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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Donald Trump

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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