If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

A terrorist robs a walrus.

Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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