How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

if you don't like this you're gay

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

quantum physics?

What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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