What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's newborn baby? Neither has she.

Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

Llamaworm

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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