Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

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What did the boy without arms get in his Christmas present? A pair of gloves. Just kidding, he didn't open it yet.

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A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

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Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

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Roses are red, violets are purple.

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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Alright alright... But you gotta promise to call me then

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what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

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WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

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Skrillex.

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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