a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

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Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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What color is red paint? Red

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

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What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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Horse with a chair on his head.

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops