Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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penis?

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Why did the black man go to the store? To get milk and eggs because he was running out of those items

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they work hard at it

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

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There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

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I'm a poet and I just didn't realise

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

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all hail based mark

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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24

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Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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What is long and black? The line at KFC

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Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

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Elizabeth Warren

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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