Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

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Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

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Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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