A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "...no..?"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? nothing because they were both cupcakes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

boobs.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

thumb_up thumb_down -7

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A terrorist robs a walrus.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats black and doesnt like politics? a black chair

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, the answer is to get to the other side, but this is an anti-joke site so I don't know why as it can't be it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man... walks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:What did sandy say to spongebob A:Nothing they were both crushed by the water pressure of being at the bottom of the ocean ni,gger

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

thumb_up thumb_down -7

42, that is all

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops