Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks into a barn.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats black, yellow and white? my wives

thumb_up thumb_down +11

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +11

- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You see how lame this is?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops