- Anti Joke

What did Jimmy say when the bully poured milk on his head? Nothing, instead he took out a shank and proceeded to stab him 30 times and let him bleed to death for being a douche.

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

Look how far I can kick this bucket

What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

Why didn't the parakeet eat my diarrhea? I already ate it.

A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Roses are red. Violets are red. I have a gun. What did i do?

What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

bees knees

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog