When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two men walk into a bar. The bar was being robbed. They were both shot in the confusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the monkey fall dead out of the tree? because edward cullen raped it up the arse sooo many times it died from internal bleeding.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Where's my baby??

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"You two form fours while I get the other one"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a fat man walks into a bar and gets laughed at because his shoes are untied

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

You know what is really annoying? An annoying baby that wont stop crying while you are trying to do very important work.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops