Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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Hey, wanna hear a penis joke? Nevermind, it's too long.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops