What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

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whats a dick a dick

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

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what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Being a Japanese person in Hiroshima on this date.August 6, 1945

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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