What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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