How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

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Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

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What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

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Jesus was a good guy

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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It's only racist if you consider them people.

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Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

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- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

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What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops