Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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If you play a Justin Bieber album backwards, I swear you can hear satanic messages... but even worse, if you play it forward, you hear Justin Bieber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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