So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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A man walked into a bar, he was extremely short sighted, after this occurence he decided to phone up the opticians to get some glasses.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and stink.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Why was the Asian women crossing 8 lanes of traffic with no blinker? Poor chink had a seizure.

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The penn state football administration

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I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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